Confessions

Sometimes I compare myself to others.  Ok, ALL the time I compare myself to others.  

It's a horrible way to live, an ugly thing to do, but still I do it quite often.

It is never a conscious decision, I actually just started realizing how often I do it.

  

Why can't I have her straight hair?  Why does she get the gorgeous kids?  Why can't I be more ambitious like her?  Wow, she's a doctor and I make coffee for a living!  

You know what I mean.  Or maybe you don't.  

From there I put people in appropriately labeled boxes.  I decide they are a certain way, they do certain things, they don't do certain things.  I make assumptions.  Scott always tells me not to make assumptions, do I listen?    

But then I find out something about that person that surprises me.  Nothing bad, just something I already decided they didn't do or weren't like.  

I think that's why I enjoy Donald Miller and Anne Lamott's writings.  They are well known Christian writers with amazing stories and then you find out something like...oh, they smoke cigarettes.

And not that I care that they smoke cigarettes, I just didn't put them in the box with other people that smoke cigarettes.  

So I decided that I'm probably not the only person who makes assumptions about other people.  I'm probably not the only person that compares myself to others.  

And I know that when I found out Donald Miller smoked, it made him more human, more relatable.  Don't you think so?  And when I realized Anne Lamott was a crazy hippie nut, I couldn't help but love her even more!  

So here are my confessions.  These are the things that maybe you decided I didn't do or wasn't like.  Some I'm not proud of, like the whole comparing thing, and others are just what make me me.  

And I know we all have these things in our lives.  So here's the deal, I'm going to go first and then if you have been dying to confess or feel like being vulnerable and exposing yourself, here's your opportunity!  YEA!

1. I love celebrity gossip!  It's true, I do.  I tried to fight it, but I can not get enough of john and kate plus 8 and all their drama.  I think I am most obsessed with the love triangle between Angelina, Brad, and Jennifer.  Scott and I have a deal, if I go grocery shopping alone I get to purchase one of my girlie gossip magazines!  Hooray!  

2. I like to curse.  Sometimes I find it necessary, like when I lost my friend's dog and then I thought I had lost him again!!!  "*&%#$!"  But then I realized he was sleeping under the tree.  "*&^%$#@!"  

3. Um...I can watch reality TV all day.

4. I take off all my facial hair with facial NAIR.  Believe it!  Have you ever seen my sideburns???  EXACTLY!  

5.  I feel uncomfortable without makeup.  I don't like to leave the house without my makeup on.  My sisters would say it doesn't help or I don't apply it correctly.  I'm sorry, I just really love blush!  

6. I used to smoke.  I quit months ago, but occasionally I miss it.  

7.  I am very jealous.  It's ugly, I know.  

8. I can't pray out loud.  It's weird for me.  I don't do it.  

9.  I wear a headwrap everyday.  You might be thinking that's not a confession, I just have really great style.  Nope, I wear them because I pull out my hair when I don't have one on.  

10.  I love hip-hop and rap music!  I really just like the beat, the rhythm, but if some of those lyrics were put in a rock song I would be appalled and wouldn't listen to it!  

I think that's enough for today.  

Thanks.  You can take me out of some of those boxes now.